Bum Bo No

Big orange fish count: 12 Empty table count: 10 Lunch Special: $5.99 buffet Vietnam Restaurant on Bryan Street isn’t very inviting from the outside, but the sign painted on the dark window says “$5.99 buffet.” And the parking around the place is always totally filled up at lunchtime, so I…

Yippee ki-yay, Mother Clucker

Lunch Special: Two pieces of rotisserie chicken, two sides, a wheat roll and a drink for $4.99 The good kind of peppermints count: a million Hot sauce in a Coke bottle count: 1 Wedged in between the Condom Sense and Condoms to Go, the Cowboy Chicken at Lovers Lane and…

The Haunting

The things about Tradicion that stick in the mind are the remnants, the leftovers. Tradicion is the work of Ricardo Avila. Avila grips the reins (along with his mother) of Avila’s, a Tex-Mex staple on Maple Avenue for more than 20 years. Tradicion penetrated the odd space that was once…

Pie Quagmire

Olivella’s is outrunning its headlights. Its mouth can’t keep pace with the speed of its mind. Or is it vice versa? It’s not hard to pick up the flavor of chaos. Step into the restaurant. Muscle a path between the people seated at tables and on plush stools at the…

I’m on the All-Carb Diet

Lunch Special: $3.95 for an entrée and two sides. A/C count: 0 Rumor that Bonnie and Clyde met here count: 1 I almost walked right past the Record Grill. No, not because it’s so scary from the outside that you think crossing the threshold of the building could give you…

How Sweet It Is

Specials: Wednesday is Burger Day with a burger and drink, plus fries, tots or a cup of soup for $5.89. “Sweetie” count: 3 Booth count: about 6 or 8 Grease-up paper napkin count: 2 Generally, I’m really un-OK with people calling me “sweetie.” I swore to myself that I’d beat…

Grecian Yearn

Kavala is like a finely chiseled face with a crooked nose or a chipped tooth or maybe a misshapen beauty mark. There’s a lot to love here. The trick is to separate those things that will make the casual peruser swoon from those only a mother could love. Though the…

Enchiladame

Lunch specials starting at $5.29 Small margarita: 99 cents Monday-Friday Free chips and salsa count: 1 Hairy eyeball count from the hostess: 3 “Do you want some more water?” count: 22 I was driving around Oak Cliff looking for a place to eat for cheap (I know Oak Cliff is…

Empty Nets

I admit it. For approximately one month, every time I have driven by the new Dallas Saltwater Willy’s Seafood & Steakhouse location I’ve laughed…for two reasons. For one, it’s the name. Another, I like to imagine Willie Nelson replacing the “shotgun” of his iconic “Shotgun Willie” with “saltwater.” This was…

Guilty Pleasures

There’s something about good ol’ American traditions like co-ed sporting leagues and state fairs that lend themselves naturally to ingesting copious amounts of the grilled, griddled and fried. We here in the land of grand portions enjoy our concessions, our tailgating and our comfort food. Like a good neighbor, Tilley’s…

Vern’s Place

Vern’s Place looks exactly like the kind of place my mom doesn’t want me to visit. So, I went. Well, I drove past it for a week and then I went. With some friends. For some reason, the barred windows made it seem a little unwelcoming. But the sign on…

From Fino to Flan

To fully plumb the pleasures of tapas, it is essential to begin with a small cylindrical glass of fino, just a couple of ounces. Fino sherry (Domecq La Ina, $3.95) is a liquid throb that inflames and focuses the taste buds. Sherry sipping is a neglected gustatory ritual. This is…

Cheap Bastard

I’ve been eyeing the Mr. BBQ bus in the convenience store parking lot at Maple and Wycliff avenues for a while. With its American flag and “2 for $2 sides” signs painted all over it, it’s pretty awesome-looking. And cheap-sounding. As I walked up, I noticed pretty quickly that nobody…

Hooked

“Strip mall” used to mean a massive parking lot, a grocery store, a nail place (with some obvious name like “Nails Here”), a wacky wing place and a Blockbuster Video. Then there might be some labor-of-love restaurant that went under in three months, unless it was a buffet, and then…

Braying Rock

There’s a certain lethargy to Stone Horse Bistro, a stiffness. It doesn’t completely unravel the place, but frays are visible through its gaunt earnestness. It appears on the appetizer menu, on the right side, under the heading “charcoal skewers.” Note four selections: lamb, sweetbreads, chicken gizzard and beef tongue. Enticing?…

Slick Porch

To understand The Porch, you need to understand the legend of Steve Stodghill. Stodghill is the humble Batman fanboy turned top fuel litigator who got rich investing in Mark Cuban’s Broadcast.com. He rubs elbows with George Clooney, Jerry Hall and Elizabeth Hurley. Stodghill is the superconducting super-collider of the Dallas…

Do It Yourself

Sandra Lee was the oldest of five siblings and, according to her Web site, helped fashion quality meals for her family on their welfare budget. Thus began her Semi-Homemade empire of cookbooks, life and style guides, Food Network show Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee and various other projects that laud her…

Crab Case

Make your way to SushiSamba, even if it’s just for one thing and one thing only. If you can stand the thick swatches of bright pink, saturated red, pureed mango and searing green that merge and flood until diners are capped in bordello halos, if you can raise your threshold…

Tavern Noir

Maybe you’re a mutant. Maybe you’re the kind of bloke who wants to waddle down to Victory Park—noting the cognitive dissonance of the Blade Runner-esque Victory Plaza big-screen flicker dry-humping the art-deco American Airlines Center—and enjoy a relaxing nosh in a neatly trimmed banquette. Maybe you’re so creepy you even…

More Gold, Less Glitter

If you bring it to a vigorous boil, steaming off the wine lists, the flatware and the dainty flourishes with raw fish and Kobe beef, Victory Park dining can be reduced to two elements: noise and loud, color-shifting light. All the big names have it, from Nove’s wine room glittering…

Just Beachy

If only The Cape Grill were situated where ideally it should be. That is, a half-mile or less from a pounding blue surf, a stretch of white beach and a friendly boardwalk. Instead, this sunny indoor-outdoor seafood place sits smack dab in an ocean of concrete near the Quadrangle, where…

Bejeweled and Bedeviled

You’d think we’d get more Mexican than we do. The real stuff, the kind that grips you with such intensity you want to light a candle to the Virgin for dessert. We don’t light many candles, though. La Joya means “the jewel,” or some such. So right off the bat…